I’ve written on the topic of divorce mediation several times, and I’m writing again today because I feel that this is a topic that deserves a great deal of attention, especially here in Wake County, North Carolina. I strongly believe that divorcing couples should be able to dictate the terms of their separation, and the attorneys involved should assist the parties in reaching an amicable settlement without the need for court.
(I should mention, even as I write this, that I have a case scheduled for court next week – I can’t promise that divorce mediation will work in every situation. Sometimes going to court is unavoidable, in which case you need a Raleigh or Cary Divorce Lawyer to represent you.)
Anyway, back to my point. Mediation is a great way to resolve your case on your own terms and without the need for expensive litigation. Most people choose to resolve their case at mediation for one of three reasons:
- The cost of their divorce has gotten out of control and they want to put a stop to the financial bleeding;
- They are afraid of allowing a judge to make decisions that will affect the rest of their lives, especially where their children are concerned;
- They are sick and tired (literally) of the pain and anxiety that divorce causes and are prepared to resolve their case.
What’s so interesting about divorce mediation is that going into it – most experienced family law attorneys already know what a reasonable settlement will look like. However, getting their clients to understand this is an entirely different story. Some people here in Cary just want their day in court. Others really want to stick it to their spouse.
My approach? Look at the case objectively and let the client know what a reasonable settlement should look like. If the other side or my client rejects my assessment, then we are likely to end up in court. If both parties are reasonably objective about the matter, then the case will settle. Alternatively, you could look to collaborative divorce and keep the courts out of it entirely. But that’s a topic for another discussion.