When considering a divorce, most people think that they will need a lawyer, and some seek out the help of a therapist. But did you know that there is also a professional, called a certified divorce coach, that can help you through the process?
A divorce coach is not a lawyer or a therapist, but rather they are a specially trained professional who can help to coach you through the divorce process, understand the system, and move you through the divorce process with more confidence and clarity about the changes that are about to happen in your life.
What is a Divorce Coach?
A divorce coach will focus on your future life, and help you develop a roadmap for how you want to get there. To be clear, as lawyers, we are NOT a divorce coach. And a divorce coach cannot be your lawyer – they cannot provide you with legal advice, draft legal documents, or represent you in court.
Here are some of the things that a divorce coach can help you with:
- Deciding whether or not you to stay in or leave the marriage
- Preparing for divorce (yes, being prepared is a smart thing to do)
- Understanding the system you are about to enter
- Making a determination of which process is best suited to you and your family (i.e. divorce mediation, litigation, or collaborative divorce)
- Helping you to find and hire the right divorce lawyer
- Assist you in putting together a divorce team and support network
- Help you to save both time and money with your divorce
- Determine appropriate goals for your divorce
- Helping you to prepare for mediation and/or court
- Keeping your divorce on the right track and moving forward
Why should you use a divorce coach?
Lawyers are trained to advocate for your interests and negotiate the best possible settlement in your case. If your case needs to go to court, we are trained in the rules of civil procedure and evidence so that you can put forth your best possible case.
But there are a lot of things that a divorce lawyer is not well-trained in, such as helping you handle the emotions involved in your divorce, and getting you organized before you talk to a lawyer.
A divorce coach is trained to help you keep your overall goals in mind, even when it seems like your case is veering off-course or your emotions are getting the better of you.
How to find a good divorce coach?
Every divorce coach is going to be slightly different. You may want to interview several before you find one that is a good fit for your personal situation. If you have already hired a divorce lawyer, you may want to ask them if they have a coach that they recommend. If you are still weighing your options, you may want to talk to your therapist, pastor, or a close friend that you know has been through a divorce and whom you can trust.
If none of that works, you can do a quick search online for “divorce coach” in your city. You are likely to find a list of therapists, life coaches, and maybe even some law firms. Make a list of 3-5 names and then give each of them a call. Depending on who you talk to and how quickly they call you back, you can schedule a follow-up meeting and go from there.
You can also visit the Certified Divorce Coach Website to find a coach in your area.
There is no right or wrong answer to finding the perfect divorce coach. You just have to find someone you like and whom you will trust to help you through this process.
Divorce Coaches in Cary and Raleigh, North Carolina
If you are looking for a divorce coach in either Cary or Raleigh, here are some names of people that we know and are happy to refer our clients to:
Donna Moore
(919) 787-5897
Donna@DonnaMooreTherapy.com
Katrina Kuzyszyn-Jones, Psy.D.
(919) 493-1975
drkatrina@kkjpsych.com
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